She can’t see all her accomplishments the way we can.
I'm a huge advocate of To Do lists. They help to keep me on track, they help me to remember all the sh*t I want to get done and quite frankly, my favorite part about them is crossing things off.
As Rose shows us when she's nominated for St. Olaf's Woman of the Year (St. Olaf's highest honor) and begins to make a list of all her life's accomplishments, she gets pretty bummed because it doesn't look like much to her. I'm the same way; even if I get one HUGE task out of the way (or make a ton of progress), if there aren't many things I see physically crossed off my list I feel like I've done nothing. But like Rose, some of my huge accomplishments were very cumbersome even they only took up a bullet point on paper.
There are some people my age (and younger!) who are significantly further in their career paths which sometimes makes me wonder, What the hell have I been doing all this time? What have I truly accomplished?
While Dorothy and Blanche may have embellished Rose’s accomplishments, there was no way that her impact on her own life as well as the life of others could be put into words or an amount. Due to the fact that she was a woman of great quality, she won the award in spite of the details of her bio not being 100% true.
A couple weeks ago I met Courtney Antonioli of the Stay Golden YouTube channel and she brought up the concept of a Ta-Da! list. I thought it was a pretty dope concept, especially when you start looking at the scope of your life. Then I started thinking about what I’ve done in the past decade. Think about all the things you’ve accomplished in the past 10(ish) years and add them to your Ta-Da! list.
TA-DA! (2008 - 2018)
Moved from Boston to Brooklyn for graduate school
Started my domestic partnership
Stumbled and failed a LOT (by my standards) as I made my way through graduate school
Studied in Italy for a couple weeks with SVA
Mic dropped my thesis exhibition
Finished graduate school
Started my design job path (LOTS of freelance positions + learning)
Got my first full-time gig at The Trevor Project - an absolutely priceless
2 year learning experience professionally and from a social justice standpoint, and I am forever in debt to my co-workers.
Had my first child
Became a co-homeowner
Learned how to manage my perinatal mood disorder (PPD/PPA)
Started growing my own company
Had my second child
Realized that I can do this Mom thing and I’m actually pretty decent at it
Lost and found my identity as Hillary
Met some of the best people I’ve ever met in my life
When you write your list out like that, include your personal growth! Maybe you’ve spent the last 10 years coming to terms with your sh*tty relationship with your parents - that’s HUGE! Personal progress is just as important!
Any time I start to doubt myself and where I am professionally in my life, I will come back to this list and re-center myself. I need to focus on the steps I’m taking, the building blocks of it all and trust that at the end I’m have something pretty f*cking awesome. I know you will too.
In friendship and cheesecake,